Longing & Fear

The need is so strong, so powerfully excruciating in its discomfort, that the preference is to suppress the emotions for fear of being weak; to be known, to be loved, to be acknowledged as a Being. Longing for intimacy in relationship with someone else.

Living on the outside looking in on the world, wondering how to really connect when the imposed beliefs that I should be self-sufficient, self-reliant, unemotional and strong in the face of adversity, that instead I shut down and present the world with the mask of independent strength. What falseness, what tragedy besets us all when that happens. Who is really served in these very moments?

Pain from Life Experience is in the Soul, in the body manifested, to overwhelm with headaches, heartaches, ulcers, and over time to reach a proportion of overwhelming power to cause depression and unprecedented despair. All that is needed to avert such disaster is the acknowledgement of the spirit in each Being, giving permission to aspire to higher goals and ideals for self and humanity.

And yet, we're afraid to give that permisson to one another. Often recognized in failed marriages and abusive relationships is this fear; the fear of being left behind, of losing our sense of secruity, that we attempt to control one another.

An observation when saying goodbye to an unhealthy relationship from my past.
Voted Top Blog no Mindsay.com for March 9th, 2005.